Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is Tuesday, May 20. I am listening to a presentation by Grace Ji-Sun Kim. It is about the holy spirit.  It is very comforting.

I did not sleep well last night because I was worried about making my sister mad, pleasing my mom, and the risk of being sent to the hospital. I also am paying attention to my mental health. I think I need to start being thankful that my mental health is not worse and my medication is not worse. I am still going to try to be on 40 latuda instead of 60 but I think I should be thankful that it is not worse in terms of medication.

And I think the other thing is that I need to remember that I am in a late stage of life and I gave it a good try with a lot of blessings.

Right now I am running a video ad for the books, and often people will say a comment that they don't know what is in the books and I should tell some jokes or read something.

I think this is because they can tell something is wrong in that they don't already know who I am.  So I try to be patient with it, even though I think I give plenty of information for at least some people to give the books a chance. And maybe they have, but I can't see any sales. 

I have not posted a video in about three months.  I hope Ravneet did not get mad at me.  I think she gets the money but really I don't know. 

I think I have gotten through the whole life span of the books and the grief cycle from that lost career.  That is a big lost career, to feel the overwhelming destiny of being a famous literary writer and then it just disappears without much acknowledgement of how outrageous a loss that is.

I mean that people weren't like, hey, why aren't we reading your books in classrooms.

My status continues as a nobody, even though I keep thinking something will change that.  But it won't.

However I still think the books will sell someday and people will find it to be a great resource.

I am having a nice time with my facebook page. I did a squirrel post last night and it is cute. I hope people like it. I need to do some more blobs soon I think.  That is easy.

Well have a nice day. I will soon write another post.