Gice I feel fine, I feel normal, I just stay up late. And as I said before one issue is having my phone only and not the computer. So I scroll more and that also drops the mood some. But I am happy with my hobby and like all the videos. I mean I already said all that but it just goes on and on each time I type “cute mouse wearing clothes taking a glowing magic marble out of a bag.”

So anyway maybe I should be rereading some books from my shelf, I mean the ones I did.

Something I was thinking about earlier today was my intro on the revelationsaries book and I was maple and my sister magnolia and my dad mahogany and my mom Myrtle. And I don’t take that lightly because Myrtle is in the book of Isaiah and mom suffered and worked hard for our family. But she had a serious disorder and sinned against people too but I think there is a suffering forgiveness aspect too so I try to remember that. I mean it is very serious suffering to be compared with Myrtle in Isaiah. And even now I want to start analyzing it which is weird like always trying to make people understand her problem but it is beyond understanding. The incessant fussing and mental illness. Those are my two new phrases and that captures a lot of it. 

Anyway I am going to try to think about how much I need to explain it to people. Because in one way I do need to stand up to people who excuse it. But in another I could just decide to dismiss them back.

Gice I am thankful I got to do the school programs, it was really a blessing and it is people to pray for and they will get stuff.

Anyway I am also not ignoring the people who clicked like on these videos. As much as I am really going for views, the likes are nice of people too, to click on it. 

They are so sweet, I will send them gift baskets in heaven.

I just still question why I had to be tortured. I just don’t understand.