Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 8 pm on Tuesday, Dec 30. I talked to my friend Tami for a while and it was great. Earlier I had therapy with Larissa and that was great too. I also made pancakes and sausage for lunch and dinner. 

I got upset after watching an snl video that was similar to one of my story ideas, but I think i should look at the positives.  Mainly, that is proof that it is a good idea at national level.  And ultimately I think their execution of the idea wasn't as good. So I will keep watching the skits and having a good time.

But I am reminded of the injustice of my lost career. I just don't understand why people were allowed to ruin my life. I have received generous therapy, but I feel that no one has been held accountable for any abuses against me.  Like literally no one out of at least ten people who bullied me at criminal levels.

I have hopes that this could be the year when there are signs of my books selling, but I think for some reason I am supposed to believe that they are actually selling okay now.  But I have not been advertising properly so really I don't think they are doing that well, except to be available for copying.

And then the society keeps becoming more ruined, so who cares anyway if you are a successful author in the mix. possibly I had a bad reading of a book today so I lost some confidence in the books as a whole.  

I just feel like one of my books gets off to a bad start.  But maybe it is okay for that series.  I think it will be one that people do seek out because of the title.  The Liberal Gospel. It is just kind of iffy in the beginning.  Should I edit it, I do not know.

Anyway, where is my girlfriend? I do not know or understand. I kind of think this whole set up is kind of cruel.  I do not see the point of it and I still disagree with the delayed writing career.

But one day at a time. On Jan 4 I try again to play games, on Jan 17 I go to the children's book conference, and some other days I do therapy. That is happy and in the meantime I can cook and walk on the treadmill.  Maybe that is the goal for tomorrow is to set that up so it is usable.