Well everyone, I just got ready for inspection and worked all day on it and my case manager is somewhere else and I don't have inspection tonight. How horrible to not let me know. What a bad person. 

I don't think I need to say anything else. God will say it in front of a bigger audience. It kind of gives me insight to other racism I have experienced. 

I have been hoping things get better soon but I am not sure I am right about that.

My sister is having problems too and it is triggering me and making me reflect on lifelong family problems.  And my mom is going to have hip surgery and expecting me to caregive. I think I should call her tomorrow and get an update on that. I think I need to tell her it won't be me who is a nurse for her, not now and not ever. It is just weird how I prepare for the worst case and then that is what happens.

It is weird to suddenly have bad feelings after a good day. My doctor told me today that she would reduce the problem medicine. Possibly she already did a prescription for 60 mg until september, but just her word that eventually we will switch to 40 mg is enough to feel relief about that.

I don't know if the bridge is torturing me because I skipped mental health program today but they possibly are.  What kind of organization gets the janitors to bully you as mental health treatment. It just makes me feel hate.  I guess this is when I pray for forgiveness again.  For a lot of people.

Well, that is all. I forgot that Drena was away for two days. I sent her a message but I think she will be happy. The nami group tonight was okay but I had to leave early. I think I made the right choice.