Ok everyone, I found the post. The likes are not always visible to me.  It actually got a lot of likes for something so severely taboo.  So people get it. They agree with me. They understand the intent. 

So I have a feeling I will resume the ad. I just feel like I had a spell and felt like I had made a dreadful mistake or something, but I know I have not made a mistake in creating the meme and posting it. 

I think sharing is okay too, and it just depends on how it goes and if I can take it.  And this is a reminder to be thankful for prior days.  I mean it has gone well. 

One regret is I wish I had followed more people in India who wanted me to follow them. 

Sorry about that. I mean who knows, maybe it is wiser to not overdo it. 

So okay. I believe I will recover from that mood drop and continue with the ad.

I just feel like it should see the light of day and get sent around to some extent. And think about how many jokes I have not sent around, like that scalpel meme.

Maybe that is what some people have to say to me about this one.

But don't you guys see how this has to do with stuff happening right now and these are the memes of choice? Well hmm we will see how it goes. I think I might always win and lose some people as a writer.

And yet isn't my stuff mostly kind of friendly? I mean is that what some people always saw? Was how zappy some stuff could seem to some people?

Well it is for teens.  I am getting on people's nerves now, aren't I? Hesitating, overthinking, etc.

Like it is not that big of a deal. I just feel like some of those angry faces are not from ignorant right wingers who are sticking up for the trillionaire.  And I take those other concerns kind of seriously.

 Ok everyone, it is possible that I will resume the ads. Maybe at about 12 am.  They aren't showing me the results.  I have an idea of them, which is about 6 out of 50 are mad.  That is not that bad.

But I don't want to lose those people who have really supported me.  Like there is a category of person who liked my name and was positive about everything.  And if they feel personally insulted, then it is not worth it.  But I have to say, do they not see it and agree? Like can't you tell who I am calling a name and why and why that name? 

I think the most interesting thing is that the ad was approved.  Which I really respect.  Because it is a joke with literary value and makes sense instead of violating community standards. 

So I guess I will repost. I mean are people telling me that they think a legal shark is at toastmasters? I feel safe there. I think there are no legal sharks there. I am having a good time with those people.

Gice it was a tough hour and reminds me of what kids go through in school.  When something is on their mind and there is another challenge that also matters but is kind of tough in multiple ways with multiple consequences.

So anyway, does anyone have any opinions? I guess it could be that the legal sharks have to react to the post in some way and might go to jail.

 Hello everyone, I just finished a toastmasters meeting and it was really fun. I was a little distracted because it was hard to tell what kind of response I got on my memes and I saw a few angry faces from what seem like nice people.  And honestly they could be agreeing with me or mad at the post.  But I think they are mad at the post.  But some people did like it.

So I hit pause.  But I might have been wrong to hit pause.  It is only a two day boost. But if it is only two days, it can be one day or no days.

So I will think about it.  My therapist suggested that it might not be worth it. I kind of feel that. Like when it is out there and some people aren't on the same page as me about all of it. Like why offend without a payoff.  And yet I feel like the post is important in some ways.  Not the most important ever.  Not the bravest ever. Just possibly the most questionable but the answer for me was clearly to post and share.

I think not sharing it might also send a message that I think I was wrong and that is not it.  I mean maybe this is like the E.T. fire post, too.  But don't some people get it?  Like every time, don't some people see what I mean and why and why post it?

People can say who do I think I am but it is not that.  It is being below it all.  The farce of people being okay with what has happened to me but not okay with that post, when actually the bitcoin post is the zinger.  So anyway I will think about what to do next.

I mean Cookie Monster and the F word was questionable on my page but it really made me laugh.

So I guess I will visit Facebook and see if there is any feedback.

I have a disease. A real disease that is making me too tired to do anything and causing dangerous lesions on my skin.  

I need to talk to Ravneet but it is hard to understand her messages right now.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. There is going to be a storm so I have to wait and walk at 7 pm. My ads got approved and I am reminded that many aces have done me right. The library of congress has some questionable rules about ai but hopefully it will all be worked out over time.

Today was a good day where a lot of people helped me and I did not feel frustrated. Only challenged with my own goals. That is how work should be. It should not be a bramble patch that only tests your character and endurance through abuse.

Anyway what a funny meme from I’m Awesomesauce. I mean it is so funny and makes you wonder why put other stuff at stake with a joke that is not as funny.

I was about to say that I could get confused and think that I am I’m awesoemsauce or psychotic delusions. But then I was like ok does that make sense to certain readers. Well I promote them to the world at large.

Anyway I think I still have a varmit bothering me. I  sure I will get rid of it somehow soon.

This is interesting to have the serious skin problems during this time isn’t it. I mean you have to see it as literary or something.

Well, have a good day everyone. 

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. Today is Monday, August 10. It is 3 pm. I just talked to my therapist. It was great.  thanks Drena.  Drena questions if the meme in question is funny enough or clever enough to spend my reputation on. like the risk vs benefit. I think I am still keeping the meme posted for now and will just think about whether to boost or not. I might do a 40 40 40 boost of those exact memes.

And it doesn't really matter. I think that is the main issue is that it isn't that big of a deal either way.

So okay. Next up is maybe take a walk.  Now will I go to that far grocery store or walk to Starbucks.

Drena does not reward missing a dose of medicine but I really did forget because of treating the finger spot. I mean maybe I should not have told her because I think I got punished for it. But she said what do you mean punished.

So okay. I told her I felt like I had already had the appointment. I mean was that bad to say. I do not know. I think she knows it was my symptoms that was causing problems. But I should not say that or they will make me take more medicine.

I told her I think I die in the Bronx but I hope I am about to move to Manhattan.

So now I have free time until 7 pm. Does anyone have any opinions?

Should I walk to Starbucks or the grocery store? I mean I do not know.

I can eat Honey Nut Cheerios for a while and do not need the smart start immediately.  It might be something to do tomorrow instead and today walk to Starbucks.

So now the only issue is the weather. I think it is about 85 degrees. That is fine for a walk.

Does anyone have any opinions? Please let me know in secret messages.

 Ok everyone, I am glad I posted the posts. I was like okay, I am just waiting for someone else's opinion.  And I feel what I did was right and that joke percolated for two years and I was patient.

So that is interesting. I mean the posts aren't even sharing that much.

I have a lot of posts that have not shared yet. But I think I am on track. And I might share a post on my bronx civil social page too.

like just share the purple post so people could find the poems and jokes page.

Anyway wow I wish these copyrights weren't so expensive. I told my mom the truth about the cost of it.

I mean it is possible that I can only do those three books.  Really it is okay. It is a good selection. I need to figure out the next three. But maybe be patient. Maybe do five. I mean who knows, maybe I will have some cash someday soon.

Wow ups and downs live and learn.

Gice the difference between this post and that lslam post is kind of interesting.  

Gice I think doing that God loves you post really worked out well. I think that was effective good outreach to usa.  It was accepted happily. I think that was a slight change.

What have I done for India lately? Not much since those other 500k posts. Those were good. The butterflies and inchworm.  So what is next.  A video? Maybe.  So I need to maybe generate a few more good videos. I think I ran out when maybe I would be happy to do a few more. So that is the next creative project. I mean should I do more images? Maybe. 

So now what, clean up some, trash, dishes, get laundry together for Wednesday. Pals, I think I made the right decision. I feel peaceful. I do the best I can. I can defend any doubts. I believe my perspective about that and think it had to be me.  

 Pals, the squirrel is yawning because it is not that big of a deal.  I know it is not that big of a deal but I do not do certain things lightly when other people have thrown their reputation in the mix at various levels.

So anyway this blog has gotten 38 thousand views in the past few months.  That is really good.  I mean why didn't that happen when I was writing more polished posts, I do not know, but I am happy to be journaling for people, too. I think that is where the word journalism came from.

I am listening to music right now. It would be good to take a walk. 

Would I go to the far grocery store and buy some smart start? I think that is what I would do. But when will I do that. It is 11 am right now. I slept okay and had a weird dream where I was a speaker at a church and then was going to get credit for it but didn't get that much credit and then they started handing out medals to everyone else for helping fight crime but I had done the same stuff.

I am having three books copyrighted. I need to fill out some forms. It is not that easy.  I am possibly not doing well and it could have been more cost efficient.  And yet I think maybe this worked out the way it did for a reason. I think I will try to do five more in the late fall, and then maybe ten on my own.  But I do not know. Let's see how this goes.

Ok. I drank a small cup of coffee but might benefit from some more. So I mean maybe walk to the store and stop for coffee. I do not know.  Maybe after my appointment.  I think my meeting is at 8 pm.  So from 3-7 I can take a walk. and yet I think there is a slight heat wave right now. Well hmm.

Gice one of my friends gave me a helpful facial expression.  I need to ponder what it means.