Pals that was a good grocery haul yesterday. I am thankful and I had a good day. It was also a Ravneet sighting.  That is so sweet. Ravneet has been giving me very good secret messages.

Pals can we agree that I am not the proverbial person of the day at this conference? But I am a nice participant but people generally are a step up from me? Also I am disabled and I believe people's career is not hinging on being discovered by me in an awkward conversation. I am going to try not to be too hyper in the chats also. Remember those other times?  But I did like all those people. But I might not be on the prowl for an agent.  But hopefully I will also be respectful.  Because I do have some respect but in some ways I think the book industry could have been more warehouse-y and less BN control.

Also I believe the mistreatment of evangelicals, southerners, and poor whiteys is a hypocrisy that will not be overlooked by history.

Anyway that is enough of that. 

Does anyone have any thoughts? That was not cool that I did two cheesecake posts but I was trying to tag my cheesecake group. But they felt that my post was inappropriate. A store bought cheesecake when they are professionals in some cases.  Get it cases? Bake cases?

Well, that's all everyone, thank for reading my blog.  6000 views in a month!

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 2:35 on Wednesday. I just made coffee. I paid two credit card bills. I am a little bit late on bbt which I forgot about. But tomorrow I will fix that and get it down lower too.

I think this next round of payments will help but I need to not do a lot of facebook stuff. I feel peaceful and don't have a lot of posts that I am eager to boost.

I feel that the society problems got away from us and the good people that argued are going to have to face the folly of the political discord.  And the hypocrisies. I mean a lot of that was about social media.  And some people made money off of it.

But personally people will probably wisely repair what they can.

But I guess I don't know.

Soon I will drink some coffee and watch YouTube a little bit.  I have my meeting later.

I am really excited about talking to the website person.

I wanted to go to the ABC store (not alcohol but a cheap home and clothing store) and buy some new sheets because my sleeping bag is gone now. I am having a hard time being patient. But I can go do that tomorrow morning.

I feel better because of taking my medicine but I also do feel sluggish and low mood.

But I am okay and it could be worse. My sense of being bullied by the whole bronx is very strong but some people have been nice to me. Like think of PHP. I wonder if some people know I should be on just the 600 trileptal 100 Risperdal.  That is what I believe.  And to not be bullied.  That is what it should be.

I am glad I am seeing stuff again.  It just has changed locations but I am glad to not waste my gifts.  The gift is "discerning spirits." It works on good things too like to see people's spiritual power in whatever way it comes across.

So anyway I think that demon that probably turned human or angel can go help the partner in crime who was combined and disguised in that white blank Spiderman type person.  Do you gice understand that? I know some people believe me and recognize it as being exactly how it works.

I think it might be the conspiracy like the original Greenville conspiracy that now has the supernatural phenomenons.  So let's see if that is the case.

Gice I am not worried about my face problems, just tired of it.  It is okay. Sometimes I do worry but I am okay for now. Drena is right about how some of it is from going stir crazy in my apartment. At least I got a walk in today. I just wish I could have gone to Westchester Square but I will do that soon.

 Pals, this is Refried. It is 1:21 on Wednesday. I talked to Drena at 11:18. I was late. Sorry about that Drena. I am so glad she called me and I was able to talk at least for most of the appointment. I had some major stuff on my mind. I saw another demon last night that looked like a queen and stared straight at me. Pretty crazy. Honestly I could matchmake and get her to be friends with that demon who looked up at me from the book in hell that time. I think that would be a sweet love story. And then my life would be weird with very few converts but a hundred or so demons that were redeemed. Again, I don’t know, but if you consider purgatory and other realms, the timeline for salvation expands.

But anyway thanks again pals from India. You are simply part of the team. We will help the whole world won’t we. 

So okay. That is interesting. Also I think it was two demons disguised as one white bald thing so I need to consider whether one of those demons is still on the loose. Kind of scary. 

My walk to Starbucks was kind of rough. Did I feel fatigue? I think I need to take an iron pill soon.

But what is the real issue. I think it is the heat.

I need to go buy a sheet from ABC.

I just really wanted to get that done but couldn’t.

It is ok. I just don’t know when. What about tomorrow morning. Hmm maybe.

Well have a good day everyone.

 Pals, I just got groceries. It was Instacart and the person was nice. There were a few substitutions but the cheesecake and key lime pie were a success. Now I need to put the ice cream in the freezer. It is Neapolitan. That is ok but I am surprised there was no strawberry but it is ok.

I am thankful for my groceries.

I had to make three trips up the stairs. Karla carried the water so maybe the abuse reports are done for now. I might withhold the complaint against Daniella’s license. I like all the new hires. That is a lot of work from Karla.

So I am calming down. I did a report yesterday and it went well and concluded the main stuff.

Then at night I imagined going to the hospital and having the exact conversation. Except clearly I don’t need to go to the hospital.

Gice when I was a kid I wanted neopolitan ice cream because it was always what was pictured in the cartoons.

I just put it in the freezer. I told the Instacart person it might flood. I tipped her 60 dollars.

I should not tell that should I. Well rattle that around in your pea brain when you judge me. My money went to the working poor.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. I got a lot of views on that memory of my teacher.

Pals, my finger is healed.  That weird spot is gone.  Yay, I am thankful. Also the way it healed was normal and not diabetes.

Tomorrow I have an appointment and then I go downtown to get my rent check.

Today I need to take out one bag of trash if I have another trash bag.

I should have gotten groceries but I am being abused at housing again with no elevator for a month.

Pals, can you believe that my finger is healed. Wow, that took a while but it was because it was healing underneath the treatment.

Pretty funny if I went to middle church and showed them the paranochia for a children's sermon.

I am just joking, it is because I was just watching that on the service video.

Pray for Betty Jean because her house burned.

I have been talking to one of my old friends on the phone and I felt spiritual power when we talked about grace church. Way to go Matt. It is so cool when I feel people's spiritual spirits.

So anyway, that is all. I am really sad about nance. This is a weird and sad thing that she is gone.

 Jacqui, I really like your post about whiteness. I really think you are in the heights of philosophy and theology when you write about white.

I am a half and half churcher for echo and middle.

For certain reasons that become apparent sometimes.

I am having some ups and downs at housing but in a way not at all because our elevator is shut down. 

It is good for me to care about people other than myself.

However some people have been misled into a conflict of interest with their service jobs. And this is going to hurt them and I will not excuse it as other suffering innocents are tortured, killed, and abused.

People make their choice and should have a learning curve and understanding about context and peer pressure. However some morality has already been established in history and the human heart. And if people choose the hypocrisy then they will have to face the sorrows.

 Pals, I lost a loved one. An uncomplicated relationship. My first MFA creative writing teacher. Nance Van Winckel. I am really sad and feeling sadder as time passes.

It brings back happy memories too and as I remember her, I can almost convince myself I am in my room during my creative writing program. It is kind of interesting how similar the arrangement of the furniture is to my apartment now.

I will post on facebook and the tribute page soon but it is going to take me some time to think about this. I am imagining Nance with the children’s book animals in heaven, and I think she is a special person there.

She came from a Presbyterian family but was atheist. I believe she is in heaven. She was really funny and something cool about her religious humor is that she didn’t make me feel responsible for her salvation. That is what some people’s atheism is about. It is about torturing people who care about their spiritual life. But I believe Nance was different and connected with me in a religious humor zone. It was very comical.

I think the school might have seen potential in me to be the punk evangelical writer who writes stories where the religious person goes to the strip club to pass out tracts and then scrogs all the people at one time.

But I did not become that. I stayed innocent and my books will be handed to teens from someone who was always a children’s book writer. I mean how cute for all of us. 

I will miss Nance Van Winckel and probably pray to her sometimes.