wow here is a funny saturday night live skit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGst0SfUm3U

i just read the news and it was worse than I expected. Trump is sending immigrants to an island and paying the hosts 8 million dollars and the people will probably be treated like slaves.  And for that money we could have had a good immigration provision for people here. I just want some things to be positive, like maybe something good happens from all that christianity which wasn't a mistake. Some stuff was a mistake, but some stuff wasn't. And I thought maybe there could be some good.  But then you read stuff where there is this wacko just doing stuff for shock value when there are solutions that work but can't be used because of political gridlock.  Well, who knows. I really don't. And people can call me a complacent white moderate for not knowing, but I really don't know.  Bussing in terrorists also was really a shame. And alienating regular nice people with racism and harassment.

Well, that is all for now. I might share some of these SNL videos. I guess people don't want to watch the stuff on my page but to me it is good stuff. I mean why is my page starved from likes on some posts. I think it is weird to pay 20 dollars to boost other people's media.  But I would consider it if it did reach my friends. As for this blog post, I'm just going to click share.  I don't think anyone needs my commentary about the news. But I actually might have a perspective that is valuable from being so lost politically. It means I might not be trying to prove I was right four years ago or something and can just say a real opinion.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is Saturday, Dec 27, at 12:33 am.  Really I just finished friday, the day after christmas. Wow I felt so much better today. I am thankful for that. Some emails got sorted out, I mailed the lego package to my sister, I mailed a great christmas card to a friend, I walked three walks, I got some hamburgers and calzones for the snow storm, and another box of chocolates, and I heard back from Ravneet, who said she had a tough day yesterday, too. I mean I do not know what she was doing, because I did not hear from her on my phone. I mean why is that, but it was nice today.

A lot of people are suffering right now.  Grief and loss, divorce, social torture, loneliness, financial problems, stress, health stuff, and of course the politics and safety problems and bad news every day.

I had a few prayer sessions after a very slow month where I could not keep up well.  I think I have made my choice, though, for a prayer style, and I just ask for trillions of things instead of putting more thought into it.  

I think for most of the 80s children, give or take about thirty years in both directions, judgement day is going to be a lot like halloween where people excitedly sort out their candy and get similar varieties, with a few whole candy bars and sodas for some people.  And funnily, one of the less popular results was always "Mary Janes."  And I think we will also have some unfortunate judgements on that theme in heaven, but it could be comedy by then. I just really do think that most people are going to get some good rewards, and God set us up for cool stuff. I mean just think of the toys and candy he gave us in our childhood, and then the computers, and social media, and now AI. Some of it has gone bad, but often that means someone is getting a reward for their endurance.  

So anyway, I also have this theory that both victories from the political sides have their virtues.  But I won't get into it right now. That reminds me to check the news. 

Well, have a good day everyone, soon I will take my medicine. 

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. I am ready for inspection which is in 30 minutes. After that I will try to go buy milk.  But probably they are out of milk. But I could maybe buy ice cream or something, which I use for coffee when I am out of milk. I have enough water and sprite for the storm. I hope our building stays heated. It is going to be a big snow storm.  They say it will be the most storm in years, but we actually haven't had any huge snows in a while, so I think it will be okay for me. 

Do I have enough other food. Yes, I have some soups, some chicken to cook, some cereal, and honestly not a lot but it will be fine.

Gice I had to email earlier while feeling tired and not as peaceful as possible. But I think it is okay. I simply explained the scenario and I think they understand. I think maybe what will happen is that they use the updated synopsis and the paper copies of the book.  And they can take a quick look at the PDF to see if it is similar enough.

Ok gotta go.

Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is Friday, Dec 26 at 3 am. I have inspection tomorrow and this happened last time that inspection was in the day time. I stayed up late to prepare but couldn't, so then I take my medicine late and it is harder to get up early to get it done then.

But really I don't have that much left to do.  Dishes, trash, table, make bed, clothes in bathroom, counter.

That actually is most of it still left to do but I did take out some trash and put the dishes in the sink.

What do you guys think about Christmas. I felt kind of depressed. I think I should be honest with myself that I do feel depressed sometimes and holidays are hard on me.

I think I should just do the best I can. Maybe allow an hour for cleanup tomorrow so get up at 11. That is 8 hours of sleep if I took my medicine now.  But I only need five hours of sleep.  So I still have three more hours left to maybe chip away at chores.

I think I will order some more joke books and try to do better about giving them away with the creature comfort books.  

Well, that is all. I feel something missing. Some people missing. But live and learn, ups and downs, pros and cons. I think some people think I think inappropriate thoughts all night but I don't. 

Do you gice like this shirt that I washed. I think I will wear it with longsleeves sometimes.

Tomorrow I need to take my friend's christmas card to the post office but it is going to be cold I think and snow at night. I should check the weather.

Well have a great day everyone.

 Hello everyone, this is my 800th post on this blog. Before that I had another blog. Should I call my friend who is mad at me? Well I do not know. 

I think now I will eat my remaining taco from Taco Bell, and this is another Christmas that I got through. I wrote three more rhymes today. They are all a little bit cheesy, and yet I believe some people will see their worth. It helped me have a nice day. Possibly there will be some later edits.

I do not know if the likes on my page are from bots, but I think there are some nice people out there who like my art and writing.

I went to an online holiday social from Nami. It was okay and I read my poem and it fit in great.  I feel happy because one of my friends who I was worried about seems okay. So that is a nice holiday miracle. Hmm, is that a thing, a holiday miracle. I think it is.

Well have a great day, everyone.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. I think facebook is running my ad now, slowly but surely. Maybe they were giving me a chance to get the poem right.  I think I can only help them through prayer and a lot of people probably share their complaints with them.  But it is Christmas and they are working so that is something kind of crazy to think about. Maybe they are mad but I think I will thank them around New Years. I will send them another message sometime.

It's just that this post meant a lot and was a surprise from God himself and then they messed it up on purpose. And that is a little snap from hell on a nice day.  And the thing is that this isn't that nice of a day for me. It is a survival day where I get through it, but there was something that improved my mood this year.  Yesterday, the review synopsis, and today, the poem.

But I am okay, a lot of people have to work on Christmas. Everyone has their sufferings and relief. I hope a lot of people are having a nice Christmas. I posted little gifs and messages for a lot of people, maybe 80 total, and that is more than I usually see. I don't feel as connected but I am still thankful for everyone I know. I mean who knows, by now maybe a lot of people don't like me. I mean maybe that means something that I see their photos now but they don't like my posts very often.  But some people do. 

So anyway, maybe I will have a good few days as this ad runs.  The other ads made me feel better before Christmas. I mean that is what I do is write, and I am 48. So ups and downs live and learn.

I might not call many more people. I might not rely so much on the phone a friend program but just call random people every now and then.

Well, that was an adventure in mental health. I do not know what is next. Will I do peer work? I do not know. I need to talk to Drena about it. I just don't know how I feel about starting over and being in another unpaid internship scenario when I have the education I need for work. It starts to become a charade with me as the dummy.  Which is what I have said before. But there is a case for letting them do it and make their choice in front of everyone. Hmm. I do not know what I will do. But I feel the tables turning a little bit where the shame is no longer mine, but the other people who bullied me. And they are caught.

 I noticed there were not many likes on my post and realized the ad is not running yet because facebook has stalled it on purpose. I do not know why but it is a familiar feeling when they mess up an ad.  I do not understand why. I mean was it supposed to go to India? I already have posts running in India and they are good. Why did facebook mess up my ad. They are waiting too late. I hope it starts up in the next hour but to me they messed up the natural verve of it and that really upsets me. It hurts me on christmas day. I will tell them that in a message.